1. |
Let's Get Away
02:43
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let's take a road trip to arizona
grab the keys, take the toyota
this old gas station is where our lives begin.
just quit your job and i'll quit mine,
ride straight on through all the state lines.
i'd drive with you time and time again.
we'll only stop for gas and drinks,
take showers in bathroom sinks,
your passenger seat is where i belong.
let's get away from it all.
we will jump and we will fall
into each other's arms along the way.
so let's just get away.
just forget all of your sorrows,
don't give a shitfuck about tomorrow.
let the winding road leads us along blindly.
let's hitch a ride to california,
waving goodbye, sayonara,
to all those who were too afraid to come along.
we'll wear on down the soles of our shoes,
we know there's nothing we can lose,
cause nothing else matters but me and you.
let's get away from it all.
we will jump and we will fall
into each other's arms along the way.
so let's just get away from it all.
we can run or we can crawl.
i'll follow you any which way,
so let's just get away.
pack a duffel bag of all of your things,
but leave some room for memories
that we'll be making, picture-taking,
bodies shaking, dreams we're chasing,
red lights waiting, eyes are blazing,
days are fading, nights are racing,
money wasting, lips we're tasting,
praying, staying, i am facing you.
so let's just get away.
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2. |
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it started off like a dream
you cast your blinding spell on me,
close your eyes - maybe it'll help you see.
take a breath and hold it in.
don't let it out until your head starts to spin,
maybe it'll help you think.
bite your tongue, don't say a word.
even though you know you won't be heard, it hurts
when you've got so much to say.
look around, where's the thrill?
you can't deny that we've been rolling downhill for a while.
when was the last time you saw me smile?
you know its ending,
your heart is aching for the past.
your voice is cracking,
your eyes are weeping over him
for the last time.
it's not the same, when we were young.
you were the reason behind every song i sung but now,
i can't sing a line.
you held my heart on a string,
and over time i felt it dangling
from your cold weak grasp.
where's the love?
what happened to us?
it seems our souls are covered in a layer of dust.
where's the dream?
it seems you've taken the best of me for the last time.
where's the fight, where's the tears?
we've been going strong for 2 long years
but you don't seem to care at all.
this is the end, here i draw the line.
i'm all out of tears i used to shed at night.
time to say goodbye.
i'm done,
i'm finally through with you.
run along,
you know that you were wrong to treat me this way.
we're not okay,
we're not alright,
i'm sick and tired of lying that I'm fine.
i'm not fine.
i'm not fine.
i'm sick and tired of lying, for the last time.
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3. |
Honeydew
03:17
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i got a thousand miles running,
I'm running through the thoughts that are in my head.
i got a way of dealing with them,
i hit them and lock them in a safe under my bed.
you're like a fresh breath of air,
i care about you in every single way.
i can't let you see me like this,
a hot mess, and it makes me just want to say.
don't pay attention to the havoc in my brain;
ill be your light in the dark-ness of the rain.
when the light shines through,
you know i will be standing close to you.
i don't know, i'm just a sour patch,
but you're my honeydew.
i got a million things I'm thinking,
i'm drinking to deal with all my anxiety.
i'm kind of worried that i'll die soon,
or cry soon from the pressures of reality.
please ignore the war that's happening in my brain,
and please don't ask me to explain.
please don't think that i am going insane,
cause i'll always be your cover from the rain.
and when the light shines through,
you know ill still be right beside you
i don't know, i'm just a sour patch,
but you're my honeydew.
i don't know, i'm just a sour patch,
but you're my honeydew.
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4. |
Silent Screaming
03:07
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I’ve mastered the art
of silent screaming,
of bottled feelings -
swallow them dry.
I’ve got a few scars,
From all those feelings,
From tired meanings
Of who knows why.
& i just want to figure out why,
this is happening.
I’ve got some red eyes,
From all the dreaming,
From just believing
In the past.
I can’t take a breath,
From suffocation -
That leads to desperation
For a reason why.
& i just want to know the reason why,
This is happening.
There is no rhyme,
There is no reason,
for this to be eating
me alive.
I should be just fine.
I should be perfect.
But it’s not worth it
to even try.
& God i just want to know why,
this is happening
Tell me it’s not my fault.
Tell me that i’ll be able to go back to all
the things i used to do,
without a problem, before i’d fallen
I’ve mastered the art
of silent screaming,
of quiet weeping
in the dark.
I’ll be just fine.
I’ll just keep screaming,
Until these feelings
Stop flooding my eyes.
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5. |
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it feels like i'm drowning in the ocean waves.
i try to stay afloat but my mind always fades.
treading the water is such a bother.
as the tide moves in, i go under.
you try to scream for help,
but your lungs are frozen.
there's nothing to fix,
when there's nothing broken.
the months go by, and seasons fade to grey.
all that i ask for is one good day.
walking along i hear bird sing the song of thunder.
as the clouds open with rain, i go under.
i've climbed over stones,
but never mountains.
i've fractured all my bones,
but i've never been broken.
there's nothing to fix,
when there's nothing broken.
this is the third time i've cried today.
i spend all my time pushing my problems away.
everyone says that ignoring your demons is not healthy,
but i will try everything to stay out of therapy.
i try to speak my mind,
but my mouth won't open.
there's tears behind these eyes,
enough to fill an ocean.
they say there's nothing to fix,
cause nothing's broken.
there's nothing to fix,
when there's nothing broken.
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6. |
terrible tuesday
03:37
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I had a terrible tuesday,
screaming at the shower floor.
i had a terrible wednesday,
crying about things i don't do anymore.
i had a terrible thursday,
cause i couldn't fall asleep until 4
in the morning.
oh i'm in mourning
from this terrible week.
call the doctor cause i believe
that i'm catching a sickness that i perceive
to be incurable.
don't let the medicine drag you down,
i got a prescription to cure a frown
but it tastes terrible.
and i know that my heart is aching.
i feel my bones breaking
as i come to terms that there's
deeper scars beneath the burns.
I had a terrible tuesday,
screaming at the shower floor.
i had a terrible wednesday,
crying about things i don't do anymore.
i had a terrible thursday,
cause i couldn't fall asleep until 4
in the morning.
oh i'm in mourning
from this terrible week.
i can't seem to see the point anymore -
its like someone locked all of my doors,
and it's unbearable.
all of the doctors talk to me,
like all i need is a nice cup of tea -
but it tastes terrible.
and i know that my heart is aching.
i feel EVERY BONE BREAKING
as i come to terms that there's,
so many scars beneath the burns.
my skin’s on fire.
I had a terrible tuesday,
screaming at the shower floor.
i had a terrible wednesday,
crying about things i don't do anymore.
i had a terrible thursday,
cause i couldn't fall asleep until 4
in the morning.
oh i'm in mourning
from this terrible week.
there's something wrong with me
there's something wrong with me
there's something wrong with me
there's nothing wrong with me.
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7. |
worthless
02:54
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Cause I’m a worthless piece of shit.
I don’t know why I try so hard.
It seems like I should give up and quit.
Cause I’m a useless piece of crap.
Just crumple me up and throw me away,
I belong deep in the trash, with my kind.
And who knows why I’m still here?
If I go, will people cheer?
Will they cry or will they weep?
I’ll be forgotten in a week.
Cause I’m a stuck up wannabe,
Pretending that I fit right in.
Behind insecurities, I’m blind.
Cause I’m afraid of getting help.
I’m terrified of getting better.
I’m trapped inside myself, I’m drowning.
And who knows why I’m still fighting?
I should be in the back corner, hiding.
I just need some answers,
To questions that steal my sleep.
Who knows what’s wrong with me?
Cause I’m a passing memory,
In one ear and out the next.
I belong down in the sea, drowning.
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8. |
ALi(v)e
02:53
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Where is my mind?
I don’t know how to be fine.
I am trying my best not to die,
But I don’t think I’m alive.
I’m alive
I’m a lie
I’m alive
I am living but not alive.
I am living a big fat lie.
I’m alive
I’m alive
But I’m not fine,
It’s a lie.
I’m alive
I’m a lie
Living a lie
Living but not alive.
I’m alive
I’m alive
I’m a lie
I’m a lie
I’m a liar
I’m a fighter
I’m a liar
I’m a lighter
I’m a fire
I’m a liar
We’re all going to
Everyone is going to
We’re all going to
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9. |
Repeat
04:24
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Wake up with a start
from a wonderful dream
where everything was how it used to be,
until reality hits me in the face.
Another dreary day of meaninglessness.
I wonder if i can ever cure this
disease they say i'll have for a while.
But don’t be scared i’m not contagious,
unless you think sad thoughts are infectious.
My will to live is gone but that’s okay.
Cause I will try again today.
And I fight my mind for another day.
There’s nothing safe inside my head,
Except the repetitive.
Eat, sleep, dream, and repeat.
If I can do some more thats pretty neat.
Eat, sleep, dream and repeat.
Try to ignore the thoughts.
Go about my day like everything is normal
while i’m writing thoughts down this secret journal
to save for when i can scream them all out loud.
You would think i’d be used to feeling like this
but after a year, i’m starting to dismiss
all hope that i’ll go back to who i used to be.
But that won’t stop me.
Cause I will try again today.
And I will fight my mind for another day.
There’s nothing safe inside my head,
Except the repetitive.
Eat, sleep, dream, and repeat
If i can do some more that’s pretty neat.
Eat sleep dream and repeat
Try to ignore the thoughts-
-that creep inside
and try to destroy your mind
They’ll tell you secrets about yourself,
that will make you feel like hell.
You can’t run away
and you can’t even hide.
They know all your fears,
and they know all your lies.
They can tell when you’re relaxed
and will come when you think you’re fine.
But you know you’re never fine.
But I will try again today.
And I will fight my mind for another day.
There’s nothing safe inside my head,
Except the repetitive.
Cause I will try again today.
And I will fight my mind for another day.
There’s nothing safe inside my head,
Except the repetitive.
Eat sleep dream and repeat
If I can do some more that’s pretty neat
Eat sleep dream and repeat
until my final breath.
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10. |
broken
06:34
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you had a funny way of looking at the world.
so damn curious just like a little girl.
you only wish you had stayed that young and innocent,
instead of going off the deep end.
you woke up one day and just didn’t feel right,
like someone came and stole all of your daylight.
you thought that this was just a cloud that would pass,
you never knew that it was only the forecast.
months went by and you started feeling worse,
it was an unforgiving and endless curse.
people told you to get help, you were afraid,
so you pretended everything was okay.
you finally caved in and went to get help,
but nothing any doctor said actually helped.
you did everything right, followed all the steps,
but it seemed the only cure was meds.
you thought you’ve hit the lowest point in your life.
you didn’t care any more about seeing the light.
you couldn’t feel anything except all the pain
that was rooted deep and dark in your brain.
you didn’t care about your friends and family,
cause you thought that you weren’t worthy
of their love and all of their affection.
you just knew that you wanted this to end.
you had a funny of looking at the world,
like a hopeless downward swirl.
you didn’t see the point of living anymore.
keeping up a smile was such a chore.
you tried to act your best and pretend you were fine.
only the closest to you still saw the signs.
you thought that maybe these small pills had stopped the rain.
and everything seemed okay,
But you were broken.
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Melissa Rorech Boston, Massachusetts
singer-songwriter.
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